In movies and tv shows, we often see the same dynamic between husbands and wives. The wives will seem to be constantly telling their husbands what they should be doing, and the husbands will groan and complain before finally fulfilling the request, usually with some silly consequence. As we know, real life is far from what we see on screen but there is something to be said about nagging wives who are constantly on top of their husbands, making sure they do what they’re supposed to do.
Nagging Wives Save Lives
A national study [1] conducted by Michigan State University sociology professor Cathy Liu Ph.D., found that men who are in unhappy marriages have a lower risk of developing diabetes and a higher chance of successful treatment if they do develop it in the future.
But what is the connection? It could be because women usually take on the role of managing the household and regulating their husband’s health behaviours, especially if he is already in poor health or diabetic. While this benefits husbands, it can be seen as annoying and provoke hostility and emotional distress.
Diabetes is the seventh leading cause of death in the United States and the more people seem to be developing this disease every year. Maybe if more wives would ‘nag’ their husbands about their health, that number could start to drop.
“The most surprising finding was that, for men, an increase in negative marital quality lowered the risk of developing diabetes and increased the chances of managing the disease after its onset. Diabetes requires frequent monitoring that the wives could be prodding the husband to do, boosting his health but also increasing marital strain over time,” Liu told MSUToday.
It’s Not Nagging – It’s Love
Nagging has obvious negative connotations. In the media we see women pestering men about this and that, painting them as the villain and men as the victims. But what’s so bad about someone wanting to make sure that you’re taking care of yourself? Why do we react negatively when we’re told to do something for our own good.
A relationship isn’t supposed to be one person carrying the weight of two people. It’s supposed to be a partnership, an equal distribution of responsibilities that lets you grow as a couple and feel the fulfillment you deserve. When one person has to take care of everything, that’s when these gentle reminders can turn into what most people would call nagging.
Even though Cathy Liu’s research has shown that nagging may have benefits for your health, do you really want to sacrifice your relationship for that? Why can’t we have our sugar-free cake and eat it to? When it comes to our health and our relationships, we need to take responsibility for ourselves and not solely rely on our partners; they are there to support us, but shouldn’t be expected to carry us forever.
