I’m a borderline introvert and it can make life uncomfortable. When I was a child, I spent most of my time with my family to socialize. Throughout my teens I found the people around me a little, well dumb, and boring. As a result I read a lot, seeking solace in the quiet study halls of high school to avoid talking to people. My books were deeper, my movies were deeper, and my music was deeper. For me, it was all about reading books like “Demian” by Herman Hesse. As I became older, I became more social and found it easier to interact with people without the need for deep, meaningful discussions. Because of this, occasionally I found connections with people capable of original thoughts. I even became better at making small talk.  The truth is, I always thought I did hate people, but now that I’m older I realize that’s not necessarily true. What I hated and still do is being forced to talk to people I don’t know about things I don’t care about. Turns out I’ve raised an introvert in my daughter. (1)

Introverts Don’t Mind Alone Time

To be clear, I didn’t find being outside the popular circle a problem. My daughter is very much the same. She sincerely loves reading and finds social situations anxiety causing. Like me, she did much better in her senior year, finding a group of people like herself. They share that offbeat taste in music and can discuss a book with enthusiasm. (1)

She avoids party situations and instead sticks to her small circle of friends. If she does go to parties, she only does so with at least one friend in tow. Then she feels more comfortable. If someone tries to talk to her, she finds herself almost panicked. She’ll never be the first one to start conversations. Because of this, she’s more likely to be found playing with a cat sequestered in a bedroom to get away from the noise then she is to be out there “having fun”. (1)

Introverts Hate Small Talk

Truthfully for introverts, small talk is the worst-case scenario we can think of in our everyday lives. And honestly, it sometimes seems we become magnets for social butterflies. Find the chattiest person in a lineup, a tourist in need of directions or some confident smirking oaf looking for someone to tease, and they’ll zero in on the introvert. (1)

Introverts Don’t Mind People

I suppose that is why introverts seem to hate people. People force us to speak when we have little to say. They want us to be social when we fail to see the point of it. However, we like to be with people. Just not in shallow social situations to discuss the weather or lame movies we haven’t seen. So fellow introverts, the Catch-22 is that to find the deeper conversations we desire, we do have to put ourselves out there and start talking. Ask a few questions and you might find the conversation goes well. They will be rare, but they will be worth it. If not, head to the bedrooms to find the cat.