Positivity in Challenging Circumstances

Even in challenging circumstances, people find ways to spread positivity. One doctor demonstrated this when he shared what mattered most to the terminally ill kids he works within a thread of tweets. (1)

Dr. Allistair McAlpine works with an organization called Paedspal in Cape Town, South Africa providing palliative care to kids with terminal illnesses. He got tired of seeing so many negative stories on his Twitter feed. So he decided to share some inspirational thoughts from the children he works with. (1)

Terminally Ill Kids Share What Matters

In the first tweet in the thread, McAlpine wrote, “For an assignment, I asked some of my terminal pediatric palliative care patients what they had enjoyed in life, and what gave it meaning. Kids can be so wise, y’know.” (2)

McAlpine split the kids’ responses up into different categories. He started by listing some things that none of the kids mentioned as important and then detailed what they did value. (2)

1. None of the kids wish they had watched more TV.

While some might expect children to value television, electronics, and social media, McAlpine was quick to point out that none of them mentioned these things as something that mattered to them. He tweeted, (2)

First: 

NONE said they wished they’d watched more TV 

NONE said they should’ve spent more time on Facebook

NONE said they enjoyed fighting with others

NONE enjoyed hospital 

2. Pets matter a lot.

Many of the terminally ill kids have a pet that they love. McAlpine wrote, (2)

MANY mentioned their pets:

‘I love Rufus, his funny bark makes me laugh.’

‘I love when Ginny snuggles up to me at night and purrs’

‘I was happiest riding Jake on the beach.’ 

3. Kids truly care about their parents.

The kids spoke about how important their parents are to them. And many of them were worried about how sad their parents would be after they passed away. McAlpine shared, (2)

MANY mentioned their parents, often expressing worry or concern:

‘Hope mum will be ok. She seems sad.’

‘Dad mustn’t worry. He’ll see me again soon.’

‘God will take care of my mum and dad when I’m gone’ 

4. Ice cream got top marks from all of the kids.

McAlpine tweeted, “ALL of them loved ice-cream.” And I don’t blame them. (2)

5. Kids value reading and hearing stories.

Stories are a huge part of childhood. Although none of the kids mentioned television as something that mattered to them, all of them talked about loving books or hearing stories. McAlpine said, (2)

ALL of them loved books or being told stories, especially by their parents:

‘Harry Potter made me feel brave.’

‘I love stories in space!’

‘I want to be a great detective like Sherlock Holmes when I’m better!’

Folks, read to your kids! They love it. 

6. They know the value of a true friend.

Terminally ill kids have experiences that many others can’t understand. Many of McAlpine’s patients told him about friends who treated them normally no matter what. He wrote, (2)

MANY wished they had spent less time worrying about what others thought of them, and valued people who just treated them ‘normally’.

‘My real friends didn’t care when my hair fell out.’

‘Jane came to visit after the surgery and didn’t even notice the scar!’ (2)

7. The kids love the beach.

The Cape Town kids loved the beach. McAlpine tweeted, (2)

Many of them loved swimming, and the beach. 

‘I made big sandcastles!’

‘Being in the sea with the waves was so exciting! My eyes didn’t even hurt!’ (2)

8. Kindness matters greatly.

Most of the children mentioned kindness as something that mattered to them. They recognized even simple gestures, like sharing half of a sandwich, as important. McAlpine said, (2)

Almost ALL of them valued kindness above most other virtues:

‘My granny is so kind to me. She always makes me smile.’

‘Jonny gave me half his sandwich when I didn’t eat mine. That was nice.’

‘I like it when that kind nurse is here. She’s gentle. And it hurts less’ (2)

9. Laughter can be magical.

McAlpine’s patients love to laugh, and funny people were high up on their lists. McAlpine wrote, (2)

Almost ALL of them loved people who made them laugh:

‘That magician is so silly! His pants fell down and I couldn’t stop laughing!’

‘My daddy pulls funny faces which I just love!’

‘The boy in the next bed farted! Hahaha!’

Laughter relieves pain. (2)

10. The kids’ families are the most important thing to them.

Above all, kids valued their families and time with them. McAlpine shared, (2)

Finally, they ALL valued time with their family. Nothing was more important. 

‘Mum and dad are the best!’

‘My sister always hugs me tight’

‘No one loves me like mummy loves me!’ (2)

Through this tread, McAlpine’s patients shared important life lessons with all of us. He summed up the thread in the following tweet: (2)

Take home message:

Be kind. Read more books. Spend time with your family. Crack jokes. Go to the beach. Hug your dog. Tell that special person you love them.

These are the things these kids wished they could’ve done more. The rest is details.

Oh… and eat ice cream.