The 12 Creepiest Things Kids Have Said

Being a parent, you’ve seen and heard just about everything that can come out of a child’s mouth. While there is the odd surprise here and there, like the first time they let out a curse word without even realizing what they’re saying.

Most of the time, these little flubs are cute stories that we love to share with our friends and family. But every now and again, your kid might say something that will make you shiver down to your bones. Whether they come from a lack of context or understanding on the child’s part, or something even paranormal, there’s something about creepy kids that can make our skin crawl.

Creepy Kids: Stories From Parents

One Reddit user posed this question to the internet: What is the creepiest thing your young child has ever said to you?

Below are some of our favorite (or least favorite depending on how you look at it) answers from parents from all over the internet.

Bedtime

I was tucking in my two year old. He said “Good bye dad.” I said, “No, we say good night.” He said “I know. But this time its good bye.”

Had to check on him a few times to make sure he was still there.

Funny Guy

While changing my daughter in front of the open closet door. She kept looking around me and laughing. I asked her what was so funny. She said, “the man.” To which I replied, “what man?” She then pointed at the closet and said, “the man with the snake neck.” I turn around and nothing was there. I’m afraid to look into the history of my house to see if anyone hung themselves in the closet. At least she wasn’t scared.

Sibling Rivalry

My 3-year-old daughter stood next to her newborn brother and looked at him for awhile then turned and looked at me and said, “Daddy its a monster..we should bury it.”

True Love

I jokingly asked: “What’s the best way to get a girlfriend?”

7-year-old’s response: “Tell her to be my girlfriend or she’ll never see her parents again.”

Bad Man

Why are you crying?

“Bad man”

What bad man?

“There.” Points behind me at a dark corner of the room

Lamp on bookshelf next to said darkened corner falls off as soon as I turn to look.

She slept in our bed that night

Mind Control

My five-year-old son asked me last week “What do you see through the black circles in my eyes when you’re controlling me when I’m at school?”

Little Sunshine

I was sound asleep, and at around 6 am I was woken up by my 4-year-old daughters face inches from mine. She looked right into my eyes and whispered, “I want to peel all your skin off”.

The backstory here is I had been sunburned the previous week, and was starting to peel. In my sleep addled state however, it was pretty terrifying for a few seconds. I didn’t know if I was dreaming, or what was going on.

Wolves

My co-worker’s four-year-old daughter always thought that the rattling of the water pipes in the kitchen cupboards were “white wolves” and the sound always scared her.

One day she was sitting at the kitchen table and she said, “Mom. The white wolves aren’t bad… they’re our friends!”

Her mom encouraged the idea by saying, “Yes! The white wolves are protecting us. They are our friends.”

Then her daughter added in, “They’re our friends, but not the man who crawls on the floor and stands by my bed”.

Waves

My niece was sitting on the couch with a weird look on her face. Her mom asked her what she was thinking about, and she said, “I’m imagining the waves of blood rushing over me.”

Turned out they had been at a local science museum with an exhibit on the circulatory system. One of the features was a walk among some giant fake blood vessels, and she was remembering that.

Bun In The Oven

My noticeably pregnant sister and I were having a conversation at the dining room table. My 4-year-old son was also present and asked my sister if there was a baby in her belly. She affirmed. He, completely straight-faced, slid from his chair and headed for the kitchen saying “We need to get it out. I’ll go get the knife.”